Blinded by the storm… 

And suddenly darkness arose 

The stars ✨ were red the moon 🌙 

Exploded, the sun ☀️ disappeared 

and beyond what the mind could handle 

Satan appeared, the blood 🩸 was thick

And all it took was a single prick, the poison spread and yet I couldn’t get ahead… 

And oh what fears it seems like the end was near, the father spoke and there was no hope, a potion 🧪 it was bitter and dry and I thought I was going to die, I cried in anguish but yet no one near, the heat of the night the sweat and the smells never seem right but yet it was alright… 

I faded away into the abyss but the pain was so real I could not breath, no air thinking I was dead ☠️ trying to climb out of despair 😩 believing I could buy yet I could not, there was no light and even the candle 🕯 blew out and misery I was and witchery it was… 

The room was cold as in dead ☠️ bodies surrounded me and yet I pounded on the door 🚪 with no avail and still the father looked on, he grab me and dragged into no end and before I could think he was inside me and oh what a disgrace to feel the power of evil 👿 and what sadness evolved…

But soon enough the mother appeared no care in the world whispering “ don’t fight my dear the love ❤️ is real, pitiful it was in the circle ⭕️  the mind went but just like that my ankle would bend till I could feel no more but yet no evidence and never a broken 😞 bone 🦴, reaching for what was so close and yet so far…

The basement was humid and I couldn’t breathe , the stench was so great and all the memories appeared, beyond who I was and what was expected of that child that cried for mercy but could not be heard, a pain of suffering and no one cared and don’t you smile and don’t you speak the voice said… 

Over and over again the wind grew deep and through the woods I went into the pond that was so cold 🥶 drowning I was and the mother says “ don’t cry my dear the love ❤️ is real. But why? I don’t understand, I’m so confused 😕…

God 🙏🏽

The war within 

Angelica, Andrea 

The Path

One rainy, windy 🌬 day I awoke at 3am to the sound of whips  on my back, I realized that the screams belong to us and why? Who will ever truly know. It was dark and the body walked deep following the path because it was a wrath of the evil one in life form, a face so familiar that shocked enter the soul but no surprise after all.

The sun ☀️ was gone but the moon raged in anger nearly talking to me as in guiding through the deepness of what was so dark, the cries were not heard yet the cries barely existed, being strong for what there is no strength but yet hard as a bull. It seemed the path had no end, barefoot as the rocks 🪨 tore through the foot and there in sight of relief…A calm pond where the water 💦 was calm…

What seem so calm was a disguise for the near drownings that would occur, it was him the evil one screaming 😱 to say “ do you love ❤️ me” yes!! I screamed the water flows through the core of the tender throat as the body goes under and above in that deceiving tender pond, it attacked and waiting on the  Mercy of my father God, finally being dragged out barely alive holding on to nothing.

The ropes tied on the body, the evil dismembering the soul that held the body together, United in the call to God and the lengthy time of wait , still I await and know the answer was not far as the blood flowed the evil one falls and breaks into anger, leaving and left in the forest 🌳 to ponder if anyone will come, staring at the pond that tried to kill me but was it really the pond?

Oh path of destruction why me? It doesn’t seem fair but what is in a world where things can go bad in the blink of an eye 👁 as storms come and go, so don’t fret my dear..my Savior is near and nothing to fear because He is so dear. Thank you 🙏🏽 my Father the one and only, despite evil you have conquered the world.

Amen 🙏🏽 

The war within 

Angelica, Andrea 

I can’t blame God.. 

And just like that the world was dark 

and gloomy 😞 the birds 🦅 died, the howls could be heard everywhere, the nails hammered him and on the cross he was, I walk never ending through the woods, the leaves 🍁 rustled under my feet 🦶, I’m over come with fear 😨 trying to get there in a place that has no light 💡 the end is not near… 

Yes 🙌 on my knees I fell, I bled and bled looking for the hope feeling on the edge my sanity was gone and I knew not who I was but I’ve heard I am a we, us, they … but why? It’s so unfair unable to navigate a direction that leads to answers in the midst of what seems to compare the constant despair..  

Help us? we said, trapped in a body longing to be human to direct as one,  but it seems impossible, I beg thee to set me free, the sleepless nights the dark circles under my eyes speaking 🗣 for themselves, there is no end for the weary 😮‍💨, there is hope at the end of the tunnel yet today the tunnel has no end… 

My breathing 😮‍💨 is shallow, I’m almost out of breath, gasping and gasping as the only thing going in is the shadow of death ☠️ , it crawls and pushes through like a building on fire 🔥 and we can’t get out!! Everywhere I turn the room is on fire 🔥 the smoke 💨 is thick just like a beast, as if having that last feast… 

Let’s not forget on the cross he stood no Mercy no Grace but anger in the wind 🌬 over what people cannot see, it was the honesty that killed him though and in my honesty they’ve killed my soul, it’s to late ⏰ said this world 🌎 the humans spoke I could only cry 😢 the tears flowed but dry they were but he died for me and understands what I cannot see so I question nothing and I can’t even blame God because it wasn’t him but yet the sin of man 👨…. 

The war within 

Angelica, Andrea 

Butterflies of life 

As I walked the dark path in the forest, I went further and further in searching for the light of God, I heard rattling noises but not that like a rattler, it was a much softer rattle along the way, I fell in a hole 🕳 and was consumed with fear, I searched did light but nowhere to be found, on my knees I found myself with two candles 🕯 lit 🔥 and they were the candles 🕯 of darkness. And suddenly the rattling got a little louder and cocoon it was, a butterfly 🦋 to be born. Life

I crawled out of the hole 🕳 encouraged that the light was soon arriving but still a dark long road, barefoot 🦶 feeling the cuts from each stone along the path, tired I was and slept in a willow tree 🌲 that would never stop crying and as I awake I see them butterflies 🦋!!! All colors just beautiful surrounding me, it was like the gates of heaven had opened, the dark one appeared but the light of God was so much more powerful. Life

It was a nightmare that had hope, I followed the butterflies 🦋 and the path has gotten brighter as the sun ☀️ broke through and the birds chirped, the evil

One was fighting but those on the side of good are more, the tears of fear but mostly joy touch the core of my sold and out of nowhere I heard the words. “You are a child of God” the butterflies 🦋 were radiating and the true meaning of the light of God came to be.

The war within 

Angelica, Andrea 

Because I am God...

Yes, we came in and there you were shoving the potion 🧪 down my throat!!!

You sold my soul and through the dark I cannot reach, the one and only and upside down you tell me lies disguised 🥸 as truth... the blood 🩸 was real it shattered near, poisoned 🤢 I was and still I know not who I was. So lost I’ve been trying to sort out who I have been… who am I? Am I real? For the sake of love ❤️ don’t lie to me....

Blank I was, feeling nothing in the world 🌎 of nonexistent, so sinister you lied 🤥 to me I was to believe that you loved me , the cord was long and in my arms I hold on tight… through the swallow the slime was real as in the rock that broke my top, away I run and still not far enough because you caught me and brought me back, drowning in evil 🦹‍♀️ believing and wanting to die… so kill me now and hurt me no more...

I looked up and through the nightmares, the pressures, the pain; it was you God speaking to me telling me child you are not alone, but is it really you? how do I know? what is my clue? your light 💡 and the presence surrounding the night and you shone brighter as the snake 🐍 took me down, the mind shattered walking away and viewing the same and still so confused because you know it’s all pain....

Wondering and pondering 🤔 how can it be I’ve cried my tears 😭 but nothing came out, the mind was on fire 🔥 locked 🔒 through the edges watching a bush and falling asleep 😴 but no I can’t sleep 💤!!!! That can’t be of me, he is coming and there is nowhere to run 🏃‍♀️, high like a horse 🐎 living in a whirlpool attracted to lies believing in truth, my finger is gone and it’s ok, I will lose that too but Lord you blessed 🥲 me giving it life and that’s ok ✅ that’s what I like 👍 ....

And who is Jesus in case I forgot He is He 3 in 1; the spirits oh no! they want me they call me 🤙 they’re coming near and oh what fear but no all mighty God you came to me and lead me free, the chains ⛓ started crumbling and almost free… but Lord? Oh what is left? Where can I go they follow me...? 

To my arms yes 🙌 my child 👶 follow me and have no fears because I am greater then evil 🦹‍♀️ and my house 🏡 is the light 💡 the warmth and the comfort, the place to be because I am God....

I died and died . . . and then I cried . . . 

Just like that I fell on my knees to talk to you,  yet dreading as I was treading water 💦 one moment pregnant 🤰 you took the life that breathed within, you gave me drugs and I couldn’t try so tired I was with no energy or pause, there at the edge of the ocean 🌊 a riptide appeared and I screamed but no one could  hear, the sound of silence was just to much my ear 👂 drum burst 💥 I cried I died....

Everywhere I turn I see the doll so black and so scary I could not breathe, the pins intact and for who?  oh what was that but it was me you chose to put  the chicken 🐔 over me it  bled and bled  all over my head as the picture burned in the silver dish, a magic  ball a magic  seed burning 🔥 inside me and I was numb.. the sweat 💦 appeared we can barely walk but then you came and you were God...

Are you real or am I pretend I don’t know if I exist or you were just me, walking in the woods feeling alone seeing the upside down cross 😱 oh no! my Jesus how could this be, who among us is the deceiver who among us died in cold blood 🩸 my friend or my enemy my mind twirled and twirled, I shivered  🥶 in fear my anger was real but silent I was because speak 🗣 I could not...and then you came and you were God....

I swallowed the slime as I puked 🤮 my soul out, I wanted my child 👶 but you said no more, you were my ruler , you were my hope because I cared you took advantage and made me two and we grew to more, once no count today 17 and that is all of we.. so confused, so ashame, the guilt the shame and oh what pain 😔, unwanted and grieving but I was not real...

Oh my child so real you are , embrace my love 😍 but no I can not , you are not real and I am scared 😱 I died for you I tell you truth he in the shadows shading my light 💡 but my light is powerful with all of my might... oh thank you 🙏 God you saved my life but still so many fears, no self-esteem weak and beneath, into the abyss and gone forever but you held me tight and said everything is going to be alright....🙏😔🙏☺️